The Moment

You know that moment when you're so alone and you just are dying inside for someone to rescue you, to hold you and tell you it will all be okay? That moment is my universe right now.

I know  I'm probably being overly dramatic, but the possibilities of reality that I'm facing are scaring the daylights out of me and I am unable to cope. I broke down at the doctor's office. I broke down in the car when I called to tell my dad how scared I was. I broke down again when I got back to my house, realizing how empty it is and alone I am. I feel like all I need right now is just for someone to hold me and let me cry. I don't need answers or positive optimisms; nothing can be certain until Tuesday. I just need to let all the fear, stress, and anxiety seep out of my system until I'm empty. Then, and only then, will my soul have the capacity to let in hope and give it root. 

So I sit, alone in my head in this empty house. Too late to call anyone. No nearby arms to turn to. I'm scared, but also very sad at how alone I am.