Loss...

Sarah "officially" miscarried today. I bawled on my way home from work between routes and just now after institute. She is an incredibly strong woman and I pray that she may be comforted through this. I know I would not be taking it well at all. I pray that if that tiny vessel did hold a spirit that it is now either finding a new body to come down to our family soon, or if it was past that point and passed on, that Nana is holding it tight.
I am thankful for our perspective on certain things, such as loss, but it still does not take away the hurt entirely. I am a gloomy gus right now. Eeyore would have a hard time out depressing me right now.

The Invisible Woman....

I have an amazing trick that I can perform... Only problem is that it only works right in the moments when I wish it wouldn't. I can disappear! I have found that I can slip in and out of groups of people seemingly unnoticed. No one acknowledges my presence unless in a one on one setting, and no one notices me missing - probably because they forgot I was there in the first place. The trick seems to be magnified in its intensity when I am in the presence of others who have this ability to suck all the light to themselves... It is like they are black holes of vapidity.
Oh well... I'm just being bitter. Happy for them, not for myself. And today was supposed to be such a good day.... All I wanted to do while driving home was cry and hide. I hate being alone.

A Sunday by any other Name....

So, today was like any other Sunday, mostly. I attended my normal meetings that I always do. Sacrament was good. I had the opportunity to offer the opening prayer - and surprisingly I was not nervous. Usually, even when giving a prayer in front of the branch I am so wracked I tremble. It was a very peaceful experience. The Spirit was super strong today was the time was opened up for testimonies. We had several testimonies from members of the Kellogg Spanish Branch, and even though I could only understand about half of what they were saying - the gist of things, the Spirit was so amazing and conveyed their sincere desire and faith to my heart. I love how transcendental the Spirit can be; how it can overcome any barrier of language, race, or disability and just embrace you in its warmth and comfort. It was amazing!
In Gospel Principles Mayra taught! That in and of itself was exciting! Our lesson was on the scriptures and she did a wonderful job - so prepared with all of her visual aids for the board and handouts! Loved it! Brooke had brought and investigator friend with her, Blue (Marquesha?), who had tons of questions about the scriptures so answering those during the lesson was amazing! I hope every G.P. is like that!!
Relief Society was, too, wonderful. Sister Stackhouse gave the lesson on Service and it was amazing. She shared, and I had the opportunity to read, the story shared by Barbara Thompson last General Conference about the disfigured little man who rented a room from a women who lived across from the Clinic where he received treatments. Such a special story. I got kind of choked up while reading the end of it. It was really, really, a phenomenal Sunday.
We had Sarah and Joe over for dinner, along with Chris, Alaina, and Randall and the kids. The Beesons dropped by for a short visit to give me a reimbursement check I had forgotten to grab before I left church. I was so drained emotionally that I space-cased it. It was a really great Sunday and I look forward to the next!