Time & Temples

I don't sleep a lot lately. I have a pretty busy schedule which does not allow me much time for sleep. I wake up early - yes, I consider 7:30am early! I leave the house no later than 8:30am to be at work by 9am. I work from 9am-3pm and then drive over to T-Mobile and work there from 4pm-12am. I usually get home around 12:30am and get to sleep around 1am. So, not a lot of sleep. Now that is my Monday - Friday schedule. Saturdays vary, up until recently I would have to be up at 8am for 9am Mission Correlation Meetings at Josh's house. Now, since Josh is getting deployed again for a couple of months I don't know what I'll be doing on Saturday mornings unless there is some activity, so I may get to sleep. Not this Saturday though. This Saturday is En-Man-richment at the Lucas' property and we're carpooling at 9am, so I'll have to be up by 7:45am. We'll be at that all day long, but I hope to be able to go see Toy Story 3 that evening providing I can find someone to go with me. Sundays are always long days. Usually up by 9am or 9:30am to be at church by 11am for various meetings/ visiting teaching appointments. Church does not start until 1pm and goes through 4pm and then it is after church meetings/socializing, then over to the parents house (on most Sundays) to have dinner and hang out until around 11pm. Then we start M-F all over again!
I know that all things happen in the Lord's time, but often I want to look ahead and just be able to know when something is going to happen so that I don't have to sit around waiting for it without knowing that it will happen and when. Such as finding a special guy to be mine for time and eternity. It is something that is on my mind a little heavier than normal right now - no doubt due to Ashley's and Joe's weddings. I'm super excited for them, but man, loneliness is magnified when planning the nuptials of others! I feel as though I have been not as patient as I should be though. I've not lived the kind of life I should have - one of bridled passions and cool temperance. I have often let my heart go off on it's own without seeking the guidance of the Lord and it has always come back damaged, bruised, and discouraged. I have decided to give up hope on finding a non-member who will be good and help me be good. I do want a good man, someone who will strengthen my weaknesses and me his likewise. I thought I had found that good man in Jesse, but he is not ready to be there for someone like that. So he shall remain a friend. A friend is better than nothing - if only I did not feel for him.
I'm excited that I have my second job though. It will provide me with the funds needed to help pay for school this fall semester. I hope that I will be strong and buckle down - achieving great grades so that I can fix my GPA and earn back my financial aid for the next aid year or semester if they'll grant it. I will miss the extra income during the school year though. I am grateful that I have this job though. It provides me a marvelous opportunity to spend extra time studying and listening/reading talks. I am trying to become better at my gospel studies so that my faith may increase and my testimony will be strengthened.
I'm not sure I've shared, but I'm working on receiving my endowment! I'm super super super excited! Each of the last 3-4 times that I have had opportunity to go to the Temple for baptisms I can recall my longing and desire to have my endowment so that I may more fully participate in the ordinances therein and serve the Lord more fully. I'm excited to have the marvelous opportunity to receive my endowment before I am 25. It will be an extra blessing to have it prior to Joe and Sarah's wedding so that I may attend their sealing. I really do desire this endowment righteously. I do not want it merely to say that I have it. I want it so that I may be able to attend the Temple when I want rather than having to wait until either of the single's branches have a trip. I am so grateful for the Temples and for the vicarious work that is performed in them. I am so excited to learn more!